When I was 19 I moved in with my boyfriend. We lived in an apartment for about a year and a half. When I was 21 we were really broke and couldn't afford our apartment anymore. My parents were giving me more money than they would have liked for rent and they thought it would be best for my boyfriend and I to move in with them. My transition was moving from my own apartment back in with my parents. When I moved back in with my parents there was so much I had to adjust to. I was used to coming home when I pleased and eating when I wanted but it changed when I moved in with them. Although they don't care if I am out all night as long as I'm with my boyfriend. They always want to know what my week looks like and if I am not doing anything, they will find something for me to do.
It was really hard for me to give up the freedom of living on my own. If I don't go to school one day, my parents get really disappointed, even if the class is cancelled. It is hard because when I was living on my own I passed classes and knew when to do certain things but since I live with them they always tell me how to do things and when, even if I already know.
Since living with them I have learned to adjust to not having as much freedom as I would like. I play by their rules. I dream of the day we will be able to have our own apartment again but am also thankful my parents are willing to help us out.
Do you feel moving transitions are harder than most to adjust to? Is it because people get so used to their environment and don't like change?
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I've had to move back in with my parents a few times in my life, and I would say that moving transitions that involve moving back in with the parents are extremely difficult to adapt to, especially when you've spent so much time on your own. On your own, you have a lot of freedom and independence, but when you move back in with your parents that whole relationship of control is shifted back into their hands. There's a reason why people say not to mix business with family, and that's because when you are an adult it is extremely difficult to operate under some sort of power hierarchy that resembles what things were like before you had a choice as to your dwelling place.
ReplyDeleteMoving transitions are harder to adjust to once you've already experienced a more free lifestyle. People can be resistant to change, but in the vein of moving back home, I think it's a very personal thing. A person I know who moved out and then moved back in with their parents loves the change. They consider themselves very connected to their family and would rather have that environment than a more independent one. While I don't think I could do that, I can respect their views.
ReplyDeleteI think that that has a great deal to with why moving transitions are harder than others. I also used moving as my transition because it was very hard for me. I think that once we become used to our surroundings, we do not want to leave them. If you are living by yourself, you are able to do things independently that you are not able to do living with others.
ReplyDeleteI think it has a lot to do with change. Most people don't like change and some people have a really hard time adjusting to it. People get used to their little "niche" and their way of life and when it gets changed, their whole world can change. This is especially true with moving, because often times your whole life style can change.
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